If you've just discovered your partner's affair, you're probably haunted by the WHY question. Why did this happen? Why me? Why her? Why? It absolutely makes sense that you're wondering this and everyone who's been in your shoes wonders the same thing. In fact, understanding why the affair happened is critical to your healing. Over the last 20 years, I've come to believe that affairs happen when three things occur at the same time...
If your partner has ever said, "I love you, but I am not IN love with you," then you know how painful it is to hear this. Or if you've felt it... like the two of you are essentially roommates... you know how scary it can be. You worry that the passion is gone, the love is barely there, and you're scared that it won't ever come back. Good news... it's not as bad as it feels... and honestly, it's common.

Dr. Kathy Nickerson
Dr. Kathy is a licensed clinical psychologist and nationally recognized relationship expert who has helped thousands of couples. Over the past 20 years, Kathy has presented marriage and relationship advice at more than 70 conferences, while authoring more than 85 professional articles and books, with coverage in Good Housekeeping, Reader's Digest, CNBC, Bustle, Medium, UpJourney, Fatherly, The Zoe Report, CNN, Forbes, Glamour, Cosmopolitan, LA Times, Newsweek and many more.