Counseling

Frequently Asked Questions

If I need relationship counseling, does it mean I'm weak or something's wrong with me? Shouldn't I be able to figure out my problems on my own?

No, not at all. The people I take care of are smart, creative, resourceful, caring people who just want to learn how to do things differently. They are CEOs, community leaders, teachers, doctors, moms, business owners, contractors, and dads. They are people like you! There is nothing wrong with them, they just want a little expert guidance. It turns out that it is really hard to figure out how to fix your marriage when you are in the marriage. Because you are emotionally involved in the relationship, you can't see things objectively. This doesn't mean that anything is wrong with you, it just means that you are too close to the situation to see it clearly. As a wise person once told me, you can't read the soup label from inside the can. You are inside the soup can and you need a way to get a clear and objective perspective on your problems. I'm here to help you do just that.

How do I know if I need couples counseling?
You will benefit from counseling if you've hit a bump in the road of your relationship and you don't know what to do to make it better. Or you've tried some things to make it better and it isn't getting better. Most of the couples I take care of are dealing with one or more of these common relationship problems:

Frequent fighting Feeling unheard or misunderstood Having the same fight again and again with no progress Recovering from an affair Rebuilding trust after an affair Understanding why an affair happened Restoring intimacy and closeness after an affair Increasing friendship and connection in their marriage Bringing more happiness and positivity to their marriage

Is it ok for me to come alone to the first session?
Yes, it is fine for you to come alone to the first session. Some people would like to have an individual session before their first couples session. This absolutely fine. My only request is that you run this plan by your spouse, so he or she feels included in your decision from the beginning.

What if my partner doesn't want to come to counseling?
This is actually very common. While I'd love to see you and your spouse together, if only one of you is open to counseling right now, that is fine. I am happy to work with you individually to discuss what you can do to make your marriage stronger. There's a lot you can do to make it better on your own and often, when things start getting better, your spouse will open up to the idea of coming in for some help too.

What can we expect from couples counseling?
You can expect to feel comfortable and safe within a supportive, non-judgmental environment. You will not be blamed, criticized, or "beaten up." Rather, you will be heard and respected for your thoughts and perspective. You can both expect to get feedback from me on how to improve your relationship. I typically give guidance to each of you on what you can do differently to make the relationship stronger and more positive. I will specifically coach you on:

how to talk to each other how to fight fairly how to resolve conflicts how to build and increase trust how to increase closeness and connection how to bring love and passion back to the marriage how to increase positivity how to improve the quality time you spend together how to prevent your relationship from getting in a bad spot how to handle problem areas - like affairs, addictions, parenting issues, trust issues, and other

What specific kind of relationship therapy do you do?
Through the years, I've found that a blend of therapeutic approaches delivers the best and fastest results to my clients. My goal is to help you  improve your marriage and get back to "life as usual" as fast as possible. To do this, I use a custom blend of the following techniques: Gottman Marriage Counseling Therapy, Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy, Narrative Therapy, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Positive Psychology and Humanistic Therapy.

What happens in the first marriage counseling session?
While every couple is unique, I start with the following agenda for the first meeting with a new couple: 

(1) Quick History: I'd like to get a little history on your life together. How long have you been together? How did you meet and fall in love? What's happened since you got married? How would you describe your life together in the last couple of years?

(2) Overview of Current Problems: What's going on now? What made you decide to come in for therapy now? What is your perspective on your relationship problems? What have you tried to make things better?

(3) Therapy Wishlist:  What are you wishing for? What are you craving or longing for in this relationship?

(4) Sample Conversation Exercise: this is an exercise where I ask the two of you to talk to each other as you would at home (i.e.,pretend I am not in the room), so I can get a sense of how you communicate.

(5) Feedback and Homework: I give everyone a packet of helpful handouts that cover communication basics, how relationships heal, and some reading recommendations. I will also give you  some fun and easy homework to help you continue healing your relationship at home.

How many sessions will I need?
That is really up to you and it depends on your goals. Some couples want to come in 1-2 times for an evaluation and to get some advice on what to do to make things better. Others prefer to have a little more help and choose to come in weekly for 6-8 weeks. Some have experienced a serious issue or severe trauma and choose to invest in intensive counseling for a few months. My goal is always to get you better as fast as possible. I encourage you to do as much work on your relationship on your own as you can; I am best used for consultation when you reach a point where you don't know what to do next or have hit a wall.

Things are about to get so much better.....

Counseling REALLY can make your marriage or relationship so much better, happier and stronger.

First, let me tell you ... If you've been trying to make it better on your own, and it's not getting better, it's not your fault. Knowing just what to do to make it better is tricky. It's especially hard for you because you're emotionally involved in the situation, which makes it almost impossible to see the situation clearly.

That's why you need to talk to someone who is on the outside, who is not emotionally involved, and who can give you solid advice with proven strategies that you can trust. I am that person and I'd love to help you!

As a nationally recognized expert who specializes exclusively in marriage counseling and couples therapy, I can tell you EXACTLY what you need to know to strengthen your relationship.

I have compiled everything I've learned from my 18 years of marriage, 12 years of college, 15+ years of clinical practice, thousands of hours of research and training into the very best tools, tips, advice and strategies for you.

You've been struggling long enough, let's start to make it better right now.....

There are a couple of ways for us to work together.....

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Online or Phone Session

In an online session, you can share your situation with me personally by phone, FaceTime, or Skype. You can do a session on your own or as a couple.  It's simple to get started...

Click here to request an online or phone session

My office manager will be in touch to go over a few details with you and will schedule your appointment at that time.  Appointments are available Monday through Friday.

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Office Visit

Come sit down with me at my offices in Southern California and we'll discuss your relationship personally in a comfortable, casual environment.

My Orange County office, located 5 minutes from the Irvine Spectrum, is a private cottage nestled in a historic eucalyptus forest.

You can do a session on your own or as a couple. It's easy to get started....

Click here to request an office visit

My office manager will be in touch to go over a few details with you and will schedule your appointment at that time. Appointments are available Monday through Friday.

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Pricing

 

Single Session

Let's get started! A single session is a great way to experience our service and decide if it's right for you. Also great when you need help making a decision about a complicated situation. Single sessions may be done in person, or via phone, FaceTime, Facebook Messenger, or Skype.

Brief Session - 25 Minutes - $ 200

Full Session - 50 Minutes -$300

Extended Session - 100 Minutes - $500

 

Package Prices

Counseling packages give you the best value. The more sessions you purchase, the more you save! And you get exclusive bonuses when you purchase a package. All counseling packages Include....

  • Unlimited access to all of the Dr. Kathy articles and online classes on this website, so you can get help 24/7.
  • Email access to Dr. Kathy, so you can ask questions and get support in between sessions.
  • Text access to Dr. Kathy, so you can ask urgent questions and get a super fast answer.

 

Buy 4, Get The 5th Free
4 Sessions of 50 minutes and your 5th session is on the house!
Package Price: $ 1200

 

Buy 10, Save 25%
10 Sessions of 50 minutes each
Package Price: $ 2250

 

Click here for insurance information.